Some Adoption F.A.Q.'s

Once the word is out that you are adopting, a lot of questions come your way.  Most of the questions are simple like: "Where are you adopting from?"  & "when will you bring him home?"  And all of these questions are usually followed up with some encouragement from the questioner.  However, there are a handful of questions that get asked over and over and the answers are not always simple, and many times received with a bit of ..... coldness.  So, since we are just sitting around waiting on a passport for Sawyer (a process that has been delayed by 3 days) I figured I'd answer some of these F.A.Q.'s.    Hope this helps :-)

1.  There are so many kids in the U.S.A. that need families, why don't you adopt them instead of going to another country?
Valid question but ignores a few things. First, there's no "proximity clause" in the Bible.  In other words, care for orphans wherever they are.  This question hardly ever comes from someone who has adopted or fostered in the U.S.A.  It usually comes from someone who isn't active in caring for orphans.   The Bible is clear that we are to care for Orphans.  Very clear.  No one is exempt.  This is "general revelation (God's Word for everyone)."  The "specific revelation" (God's Word for you) comes through prayer and leadership from the Holy Spirit.  He will lead you to how you specifically care for Orphans.... foreign or domestic, adoption or fostering, financially or emotionally.
Secondly, it is much cheaper to adopt a child in foster care.  Like, free.  Go for it:-)  I think if you're asking this question, it is evidence of God working in your heart for the orphans near you!

2.  You've already got 4 kids, why would you want to adopt another?
We met an orphan.  We have an extra bedroom.  God wanted us to.

3.  How did you know you were supposed to adopt?  Did you "feel called"?
We asked God to stop us.  He didn't.
In the Scriptures there are tons of things that God mandates clearly for His followers to be active about. Orphan care is one of them (James 1:27).  Sharing our faith, worshipping, Prayer, caring for Orphans, and many other Biblical mandates don't require another call.  The "call" comes when we trust Christ.  Now it's just a matter of obedience.

4.  So how do we know if we are "called" to adopt?
Here's where I think the story of the Good Samaritan speaks to us.  In Luke 10, the good Samaritan saw a need and met it.  So, if you see a hungry person, feed him.  See an Orphan, care for him.  God puts people and situations in front of us all the time.  Your call is to be like Jesus.
P.S.  Going out of our way to NOT meet an orphan so the Good Samaritan principle doesn't apply to us is...well...just proof of a heart issue.

5.  So does this mean every Christian is supposed to adopt?
That would be awesome!  But obviously not everyone can.  I do think we make a mistake in assuming we are not supposed to adopt and asking God to write it in the sky if we are.  It seems more Biblical to assume we are supposed to adopt, and then ask Him to stop us if He has a different plan.  This is what He did for Paul.  Paul took the Great Commission serious and went from place to place preaching and planting Churches.  Sometimes God stopped Him (Acts 16) and other times He pushed Him.  Point being, we've got to do something.  There are hundreds, if not thousands of ways to care for orphans.  You can host (www.newhorizonsforchildren.org), donate to an adoption grant, be foster parents, offer respite care, pray and encourage an adoptive family, or encourage your church to REALLY get involved with an orphanage (www.thehopeepidemic.us).

6.  Why do people who are adopting or have adopted seem so "clique-ish"?
The same reason recovering alcoholics seem clique-ish.  It's a huge part of your life and you need people around you for support who know what it's like.  It's a hard journey and people who share the same struggles and place in life have a way of finding one another.

7.  People who adopt seem to think they are better Christians. Not really a question, but I've heard this quite a few times.
Just not true.  Honestly, it's my opinion that people I've heard say this are saying this as a smoke screen for the push they feel from the Lord to do more for Orphans.  I could be wrong.  Now, some people do think they are better Christians than others....but this is way more of a flesh & pridefulness issue and not an adoption issue.  Everyone I know who has adopted or fostered has been humbled in huge ways and sees their need for Grace more than ever before.  If someone is arrogant, its not because they adopted and think they have arrived at the pinnacle of Christianity.

So there you have it. Walk away more intelligent than ever before and ready to email us your desire to adopt one of the 99 other kids from Sawyer's orphanage.
Just kidding.
But I'm not.
But really, hope this was somewhat insightful!

Love,
Jono, Heather, & Sawyer Long

You Know What Assuming Does

Well, when we hopped on a plane last Tuesday with one outfit for court and one outfit to ride home in, we assured our kids (and ourselves) that we would be back in the States by Friday evening.Yet, here I sit in my little hotel room in Aytharka trying to invent a fashion equation that gets equal use out of each article of clothing while also mixing and matching. I’m not gonna lie...when the first words we heard when we got off of the plane were “I have bad news for you”, I had a mild panic attack.  But at that point we were told that we would only push court back one day to Friday (all for 1 missing signature). Home Saturday. Not too big of a change. And from that point right up through having court moved to Tuesday, I can’t tell you how many people have told us in one way or another, “It’s all God’s timing.” You may think right now that I’m about to go off on how cliche that is and how it drove me crazy, but I’m not. Because all million times I heard/read it, I needed to be reminded that God loves my babies even more than I do and if He sovreignly allowed our absence to be longer, then 1) He’s taking good care of them and 2) He MAY just see a way bigger picture that I can’t and have a plan behind this extended stay. 

So I started muttering to Jono...”What could the reason be???”...I literally stayed up ALL Friday night tossing and turning and asking God to clue me in. It sounds spiritual, but really I’m just nosy. Because I had thought that maybe we’ll never know until we get to Heaven why God planned this and that just drove me crazy. Well, I’m not gonna say I’ve definitely figured it out, but maybe I have. And her name is Snizshana. Cutely called “Snishka” by our boy. We met her the first day that we saw Vitya, and every day that we visit since then, the two of them are waiting together at the entrance to the orphanage. They have taken us on tours, played endless amounts of UNO, thrown a football, and played on my ipad with us.  I knew I liked her within minutes of meeting her. We “Anne of Green Gables” fans call it kindred spirits. I was sitting with Vitya and she walked by and I told him, “I like her.”. He translated it to her and she said, “Da?” (“Yeah?”) and he said “Da!” (Yeah!”). It was so sweet like he wanted her to know that I liked her and she was taken aback by it. It made me just wanna smooch them both. So she’s been hanging with us all the time now.  She had a birthday the Monday after we returned home the first time, so I took her a gift this time and asked her if she had a good birthday through our translator. She said that she didn’t because no one cares there and they don’t do anything for birthdays. Yep. Just go ahead and let your heart break with mine.  Almost 100 kids in an orphanage and not one of their birthdays are important to one being on this entire earth. If there was a dern Party City in this place you betta bet there would’ve been one heckuva partay up in there the next day. But there isn’t, so I’ve taken her birthday treasures every day like nail polish, chocolate, and lip gloss.

Anyway, I’ve fallen in love with this sweetie. And it popped in my head one day that-WAIT!-we came approved for a boy (Vitya), and a girl up to 18 years old! This was just in case something worked out with Oksana...we wanted to be ready. But now at 18 she can only come on a possible student visa. I remained calm and didn’t start begging Jono like a 5 year old who wants a new kitten, I promise. However, he was finding her just as sweet and adorable as I was. And about the time we were both getting brave enough to talk about it, the facts hit us. She is 16 years old. The U.S. will not allow a child to be adopted internationally once they are 16 (stupid law that needs to be changed) UNLESS they have a younger sibling who is under 16. Which she does. She has an 11 year old brother. That’s good news for her because it gives her 2 more years to find a family. But, assuming that we confirm that these facts are correct, it takes us off of the table as snatching her precious self right up.

Speaking of her bro, we’ve seen him quite a bit also. He’s a very sweet, affectionate little boy. He just always has classes to go to or something and doesn’t hang around as much as his sister does.

So I’m typing all of this in hopes of bringing attention to this sweet sibling group and really, the whole orphanage. People, this place is in the middle of nowhere.  There are 90 something kids there who will never have a chance at a family short of maybe this blog post. It really freaks me out when I start to think about it. Snishka and many other kids will age out of there at 16 and go on to, what? What would you have gone on to if you were homeless and family-less at 16? Even in the good ol’ USA where dreams come true you know that would be a pretty bleak future.  I’d be a mess if I was homeless and family-less at 31.  It sucks, it’s wrong, and I have areally hard time hearing someone say “We’re just not called to adopt” until they’ve walked through these halls, hugged a child who has NEVER been hugged, and seen exactly what their existence consists of.  While we’re thinking about how it would mess up our schedules and finances and post-retirement plans, kids that Jesus told HIS FOLLOWERS to CARE FOR are living with less love and attention than 99% of our pets are. 

I’m sorry. I was bound to have one big rant. Please forgive. But I want to find some families for these kids. And why is it so flippin’ hard? I’ve been a Christian for 18 years and been a member of 5 churches. Shouldn’t I have enough Christian families on my contact list to make a good dent in this place? (oops. Sorry. There I go again.)

So pray please.  There’s a huge part of me that hates saying that. Like, “Hey. So there’s these kids I met that don’t have people who love them or protect them or give them gifts or ever, ever, EVER talk to them about Jesus and the majority of them are on the road to prostitution, drug abuse, or suicide. Just pray and ask God if He wants you to do anything.”  

I feel like I need to insert here that the majority of my disgust is toward myself.  Because I know that a few months ago that was me. At the fair wondering, “Will we ever be able to afford to come here again? I bet this is our last time. Farewell greasy food and creepy carnies.” And in a few months it may be where I’m right back at. And I hate that. Living life like I gotta make the best of it as if eternal perfection is not awaiting me just around the corner. You know? I mean, if I really believe I’m going to Heaven and will be there forever and it’s perfect, why the heck am I so afraid of messing my life up here (which is supposedly, according to the Bible, just a wisp/vapor) with caring for orphans? What if we did just keep on adopting and had to wear old, ugly clothes and never eat anything but Ramen again? Do I really think that Jesus is gonna say to me, “Girl! Why didn’t you live it up? I really just wanted you to enjoy vacays and nice cars.” No. We don’t think that. We know deep down that if we live like eternity is real then we’ll err on the side of absurdity. We know we’ll never hear “Why’d you feed all those people?/Adopt all those kids?/Give up everything?”. We know it.  We just need to be reminded a LOT that life is super short and it isn’t given to us to see how awesome we can make it for ourselves.  

So I’m gonna be praying about all this too. First of all, that there ends up being some miracuous way somehow that we can just bring Snishka home ourselves. But if not, for her a family. And also, that God would mess me up so bad during this trip showing me these kids that I will never go back to making all of my decisions erring on the side of what is most sensible and comfortable to my life.  May we always assume that He WANTS us to do something and trust Him to stop us if He doesn’t instead of assuming that He WANTS us to do nothing and remain comfy and thinking that He’ll write it in the clouds if He does. 

~Heather~

Trip #2 of 3

Trip # 2 has begun.  I am sitting in Munich Germany writing this, waiting on our next flight.  This trip is short and crazy.  We are literally flying all the way to Kiev Ukraine for a brief (approx 30 min) court appearance with Vitya. Friday morning we fly back home.   The good news is that this trip will make it officialish.  Once court is finished there is a 10 day waiting period by law before we receive the decree stating he is a member of the Long fam.  That 11th day (Nov.5) is when we will return to do the final paperwork, passport apps, visa apps, physicals, etc.  And I must say I'm a little nervous about trying to find somewhere to watch the election results in Ukraine.  And I'm a little more sad that I won't get to have my quadrennial election results & hot wings party.  But, it's all worth it right?!
The question we get a lot, besides "why would you adopt internationally when there are so many kids in the U.S. who need families? & aren't you worried about how this will affect your life?" is "when will he be home?"  Vitya will not come home with us Friday at the end of this trip.  We will return to Georgia, once again without him.  Its at the end of the 3rd trip that he finally get's to come home and begin the process of getting settled into the crazy life that comes with being a Long.  Hope he's ready!!  Thank you for your prayers and support.  For those of you who have asked about giving a financial gift to help with the cost of travel, you can click on the "donate" button at the top right of this blog. Anything you wish to give will be HUGELY appreciated!

Love you all!
Jono

Melted Our Heart

Today was the big day.  The one we've waited for since January of 2010 when we took Oksana & Vitya Sushko to the airport to return them home after hosting them for a month.  Today we went to the orphanage..... // "going" to the orphanage was a 1.5 hour trip with 6 people in a toyota corola //.... and finally got to see Vitya.  I can't even describe the feeling when he walked into the room.  No one told us he was coming so we were shocked and awed when this handsome young man came in smiling! We were able to give him  huge hugs and love on him a bit.  We laughed and shared about all of the memories we had from hosting and hugged probably 20 times.  One of our prayers was that Vitya would smile when he saw us and that it wouldn't be an awkward moment.  God answered and Vitya smiled from ear to ear and just kept looking at us in what seemed to be disbelief.  It was surreal for all of us.  It was a day that none of us will ever forget.  The visit ended with Vitya signing the adoption agreement.  This form will be submitted to the court letting everyone know that Vitya wants to be a part of the Long family.  So thankful to God for where He has brought us.  Please continue to pray.  The next step will take place Monday.  We learned today that the paperwork has to be submitted to a "commission" in Vitya's birth-town and they must approve him being adopted separate from his siblings.  He has a little brother whom he's never met that has been adopted in country.  Please pray this doesn't hold up the process.  Once the seperation is approved, the paperwork will then be sent to the court and hopefully we will receive a court date.  Once we've been scheduled for court we will return home to Georgia until the court date.  We will keep you posted!  Keep praying.  We love you all and are so thankful for your support!
Love you!
Jono & Heather

Trip #1 Update

It's been a pretty long 3 days.  Right now it is Wednesday afternoon and there is so much going through my mind.  This morning was our appointment with the State Department of Adoptions.   These are the people who basically are the first one's to say we can adopt.  It was pretty much just a technicality, but an important one.  We go back to the S.D.A. tomorrow around 3p.m. (8a.m. @ home) to pick up our referral (the much awaited piece of paper saying we can adopt Vitya). Once we have that we will catch a bus for a 3 hour ride North to the town where the orphanage is.  Once we are there we will meet up with the social worker and be interviewed with Vitya......(by the way, His given name is Viktor, Vitya is short for Viktor) and they will make sure we aren't "forcing" him to be adopted.  After that it is just a waiting game until the paperwork has been submitted to the court.  While we are waiting.....for 5 days or so.....we will get to spend time with Vitya at the orphanage until we come home.
I'm excited and nervous about seeing him.  We've been waiting so long and really never thought this would really happen.  So much so that it is hard to believe we are really here.  We are so ready to take him home and get started with his new life.  We were told today that he is very ready to be out of the orphanage.  I've spent the whole day wondering if he gets picked on by bigger boys.  Does he wonder what took us so long?  Does he remember the fun we had when he visited us 3 years ago?  I wonder if he will want to have a new American name.  I wonder if he remembers my Memaw and what he will think when I tell him she is gone.  I worry someone will scare him into not wanting to be adopted like has happened to so many other kids.  Our life has changed so much since we had him.  When he was here we had 3 kids.  Now we have 5, including him.  We were at a different Church.  I was cooler....ok, maybe not.  Lots of things have changed but my trust is in God who is unchanging and has called us to something I could have never imagined.  I relate to the Prophet Jeremiah when God called Him out.  Jeremiah's reaction was fear and a deep feeling of inadequacy (Jer. 1).  But God pointed out: "I called you to this before you were ever born.  This was my plan while you were in your mother's womb."  We know that God called us to this way before He ever put it on our heart and He has prepared the way.  So my fears have to be taken captive and my focus has to be on the truth that my only job is to do exactly what the Lord has said.
~ Jono ~

Finally:-)

We finally got a recent pic of Vitya.  (taken Sept. 2012)

I don't think ANYONE can understand how diligently and insanely one can obsess over their email unless they have adopted. Seriously. You're told, "Watch for an email about when your SDA appointment is.", and suddenly your WHOLE. ENTIRE. LIFE. is punctuated with random email checks. As in, get the kids up and eating breakfast...check email. Family devo...check email. Change diaper & check email at same time. Give spelling test and check email during it so your daughter says, "Moooooommmmm....I said NEXT!". Park at grocery store, check email, shop & vow not to check email until you're back in the car. End up in a long check out line and justify checking. I have checked my email in the bathroom, in the bed, in the car, in church, possibly while driving, while eating, while at social events when I'm sure I looked SOOOO rude, in the middle of conversations with people...

(I distinctly remember talking to my mom &, out of pure habit and/or desperation, checking my email while she was talking. Sorry mom:)). 

There is no waiting like this waiting. And it's multiplied by the fact that we've already waited 2 1/2 years for our boy. So, irony of all irony, the morning it comes is probably the ONLY morning in the past month that I haven't checked my email the second I woke up. That's right! WEEEEEE'VE GOTTTTTAAA DAAAAAATEE!!! Jono walked up to me this past Tuesday morning and said, "So, have you checked your email." I knew immediately what it was. I opened it up and we are scheduled to meet with the SDA in Ukraine on October 10th! That is exactly 18 days, 2 hours, 4 minutes and 41 seconds from the time I am typing this. And right after that appointment we will get on a bus and ride out to his orphanage and I will HUG AND KISS HIM...after 2 1/2 years of not seeing him or talking to him, I will scoop him up and remind him that he is a Long and he is loved quite fiercely.

So, I just wanted to share that exciting news with you, our friends, family, and supporters. 

This also means that we will need to raise the remainder of our money by then. We, very, very unfortunately didn't meet our goal to make Jono do a new video.  But I personally think that you guys still deserve a little love for all you have given, so maybe I can work some magic and make it happen. In the meantime, I'm just asking you to pray with us very specifically for $12,610. It's way more fun when super specific prayers get answered. Especially when there's a group of us praying for it. So join us, will ya? I know that Satan works hard against all adoptions. I've watched enough friends go through the battle and the hardships. But God really laid it on me that there has been some major spiritual warfare surrounding our V and his sister. So I'm BEGGING for some real pray-ers to kick it into gear for us and them. And I'm assuming that our little man is bound to grow into a godly and powerful force in the kingdom.

::Here's to 3 more weeks of waiting:)...

 ~ Heather

Lucky Number 13

So, first of all I've gotta blow a few million kisses your way for helping us crush the challenge that was recently extended to us! We asked you fine people to help us raise $2,000 in 3 days so that we could win a $1,000 bonus. And boy did y'all pull through! $4,860 later, the challenger stuck that bonus check right in the mail! This is a little message straight from Pax to you: Click Here to Watch

Thats right! You guys are the BOMB DIGGITY! 

Now, while that was a crazy awesome way to jump start our fundraising, we still have a little ways to go. If you recall, we have to have $18,000 ready to go with us when they give us the word. (By the way, we should be hearing about when our court date is within the next weekish!!). Plus airfare and hotel fees. As of now we have $6,729, so there's still $14,271 to go. And that, ladies and gentlemen, brings me to my next challenge. While it was issued by the same challenger as the last one, I thought that I should maybe throw in a little something for you. I mean, I personally believe that taking care of orphans and adopting is really delving into some deep, dark spiritual strongholds, so just knowing that your money is helping fight that battle and the reward God has for you is probably more than enough motive for good folk like you. But there's no harm in sweetening the pot a bit with a good ol' music video featuring none other than Jono himself, is there? That's right, people. You heard me correctly. Another one of these gems: Racquetball Boy

You're in, right? What was that? You wanna do whatever it takes to make sure the world  gets some more of this goodness? Well, ok. Here's challenge #2 from Mystery Texter herself. We're looking for 250 people to donate $13 by September 13 to help bring our sweet 13 year old Vitya home! If you meet the challenge, I will personally force J.Lo Supastar to write/produce/star in a brand new music video! And what's better is that when you donate you can enter your suggestion for a song or topic to base the video on. We will choose the most popular request that we get, so get your buds all in on it. (I, personally, would like to see him redo "Boyfriend" by Justin Beiber.)  I mean, could there be a better deal in the WHOLE. ENTIRE. WORLD? For only $13 you get to live out James 1:27, change a fatherless child's life, be an awesome friend, AND birth a YouTube sensation. I know! Your mind is blown, right? It just seems too good to be true. But it's not, doll. This is reality, so let the donations and requests begin. 

In the meantime, I'll get that talented man of mine back on his yoga regimen and drinking that herbal tea for his vocs...you have NO idea the kind of prep one of those productions requires...

-Heather